Sit down to read this, it is going to rock your world.
I want you to think back to your first dance, not the first time you did at a class with the poor footwork, confusion and that self-doubt going on.
I mean THE first dance, the one where you were asked to dance with someone who was sooooooooo good. You took their outstretched hand with some trepidation, you knew they were one of the better dancers in your class, you’ve been watching them, but you couldn’t say no even though you aren’t good enough to dance with them.
The music starts and what was clumpy and all over the place, suddenly comes into focus. Their hands are giving you confidence by simply being there. Your steps are now sure and clear.
There is a little stumble that could ruin everything, but they are there, they have this moment under control, it’s not an issue, its part of the whole and you are both in this together.
They are reading you and everything you are doing to create a real dance. You, the newbie, are keeping up with them, they could fly so much higher, but here and now you are flying together.
All your fears and doubt disappear as your mind reaches up further than before and a little part of you lights up and says “I can do this.”
Inner joy lit, dance addict created.
They seem to hit a high level of connection repeatedly. These few will have a special little place in your heart because they showed you the path.
And since then we have all been constantly trying to find the same thing with others with fleeting success.
Until today, where you get to figure out what they are doing. So you can do it, and you get to be one of the ones that show the way.
The Dance Conversation
Ever since I started dancing, I have heard about the dance conversation; it gets used in reports, banded about in dance halls up and down the country. It is used all around as a sort of universal catchphrase for teachers to hammer home a point and has become a kind of mantra from the experienced aimed at newbies.
Dance conversation this, dance conversation that.
And because it gets used a lot, it creates a kind of thinking process.
To me, to you, your turn my turn, I lead you follow, this then that, action reaction.
That process that was useful at the beginning is now the same process that is holding you back.
From now on you want to consider what we do as a dance duet.
Why Zorro? I hear you ask; it’s just one word describing the same thing.
NO I scream back slightly too animated cos this kind of stuff bugs me, no it isn’t. Words have power, and just changing one will make all the difference in how you think about what you do.
A conversation can be back and forth, an exchange of ideas. It can also be someone going on a bit and not letting the other say anything. It could be a shouting match.
A duet is two people working together to create one thing; they have to listen to each other to make sure what they are doing is matching, or harmonising with or even countering against but always complementing what each other is offering.
- Which sounds like dancing to you?
- How many of you have had a dance from the first point?
- How many of you instantly want a dance from the second?
The Dance Duet
With this one small, iddy biddy detail banging about in your noggins, your movement will have to change, your connection will improve, and your enjoyment will heighten.
You will be looking for moments that you didn’t even consider were important before. You will be adding to every move as your mind tries to figure out if you are in balance. You will be more involved and focused.
All their weaknesses and strengths now become notes. As do yours. Every movement needs to be acknowledged so you know what to do to make it more than the individual components.To make the dance sing.
Let this very simple but efficient way of just thinking, improve your dancing.
It will, and you already know that it will.
Thoughts are going through your head about when you space out and just go through the motions; you won’t be doing that anymore because a part of you now needs to know what your partner is doing.
Or if you just bang out the moves like a regimented Sargent, then that needs to change.
You might not have what that is right now, but you will be looking out for the opportunities to learn or figure something out as you go.
And it works for everybody, follows, leads, newbies or not.
You don’t even need to include your dance partner in the thought process if you just want to work on how you can create your voice, or just to get used to it.
Just walk in, dance your dance and leave. NO FUSS NO MUSS NOR DRAMA. But notice the difference in what you did.
Because you will have done a lot of small things differently.
Now, imagine if you and our partner were both thinking it. How good would your dance be then?
All you have to do is mention it. “ I often think about dance being a duet,” you say innocently to some poor unsuspecting dolt and watch their minds go ‘Click.’
Great Partner Dancers
That is what great dancers do; they may not articulate it in this way, but it is why they are so good.
You know in yourself that they seem just to be so aware of everything that’s going on. How, if you wobble or miss a step they have already slightly altered the move/their movement or timing for it to included.
That is how they do it, and it is how you can too.
I could challenge you to try it once and then tell me if I’m wrong, but even as you read this, you already know it will work to improve your dancing.
More importantly, you already know why it will work.
Because my brothers and sisters of the dance floor, as we are all aware deep down in our special little shoes. Dancing is more than just the moves.
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